Surviving Infidelity: A Personal Story

by HappyNow
(London)

Reader Post: Surviving infidelity isn't a topic I ever thought I'd want to write about ~ until my wife cheated on me.

There were a lot of warning signs that I didn't notice, probably because I thought I could trust my wife. She had gone back to school, and had many male friends. They came over to our house quite a bit, and she went out with them a lot. Even when people around me started to suspect she was cheating on me, I still didn't want to believe, because we had so much history together, and this blinded me to the truth. It wasn't until I left on a business trip, and came back early that I found out the hard way.

We had two children, and even when I kicked her out of the house, I didn't want to fight over the kids, but she did. I ended up letting her take care of them, but after I found out she neglected them, I tried to get them back, and she kidnapped them. It took me almost eight months to find them. She spent some time in jail, got out, got in trouble again and is now currently incarcerated.

It took me a long time to trust women, both because of infidelity, but also because of the kidnapping. I realized though, and this is something that everyone has to realize, is not all people cheat, and they are not all the same.

Surviving infidelity means one has to move on with your life. I am married again to a wonderful woman, we have been together for over 6 years now. We believe and practice what I like to call the holy trinity of relationships: communication, honesty, and trust. Without these things as a strong foundation, there can be no relationships. All three of them are related and intermingled, and if one of them breaks down, everything soon falls apart.

Surviving infidelity is about letting go of the past, but remembering your experiences so you can learn from them.