Online Affairs

by Brianna
(Brisbane)

Reader Post: 'I agree that online affairs can be devastating to a marriage - yet I have engaged in three online relationships myself.

It's hard for me to explain why I did it, since I do love my husband very much. I guess one reason is that we've both been so busy with our own lives that we don't share that much anymore. Another reason is that all three guys that I got involved with made me feel so wonderful about myself. To be honest, I enjoyed the attention. And there was no pressure to 'look good' or to change my bad habits - I could tell them exactly what I wanted them to know about me and just ignore the rest. This allowed me to present myself as 'perfect' - much like I assume they presented themselves to me too.

What I've learnt is that it's not a good idea to meet an online lover. I met Mr. Online Affair #1 and it was disastrous. We just did not have the same chemistry in real life that we had online. Mr. Online Affair #2 cooled it with me after he met someone in his home town and pursued a committed relationship with her. And I'm in the process of letting go of Mr. Online Affair #3 as I just can't see it developing any further.

My husband doesn't know about my secret life and he would be devastated if he found out. I don't want to hurt him, yet it's almost as if I'm addicted to the thrill of feeling so wanted and desired. It gets tiring to always have to cover my tracks - maybe I should just try and invest all that energy into my marriage and see where that takes me.'