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What is Acceptance and Commitment Therapy?

Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) is a unique and creative model for both therapy and coaching, based on the innovative use of mindfulness.

The aim of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy is to help people create a rich, full and meaningful life, while effectively handling the pain and stress that life inevitably brings.

This is accomplished by teaching you psychological skills to deal with your painful thoughts and feelings effectively – in such a way that they have much less impact and influence over you. It also helps you to clarify your values – that which is truly important and meaningful to you. Once you know what you value in your life, you can use the knowledge to guide, inspire and motivate you to change your life for the better.

With ACT you will learn mind tools that will help you interact with your own mind in a totally different way.

I am sure you will enjoy reading our interview with Dr Russ Harris on ACT with love, as well as the link between mindfulness and sex.

'Mindfulness can wonderfully enhance physical intimacy. Whether you're kissing, hugging, caressing, nuzzling, holding hands, stroking, undressing, embracing, or having foreplay, oral sex, or intercourse, mindfulness can intensify both the pleasure and the sense of deep connection. When you tune into the sensations in your own body and tune into the reactions of your partner, sex becomes an absorbing and engaging experience - far more pleasurable than when you're all caught up in your thoughts or focused on achieving the goal of orgasm.'

Extract from ACT with Love by Russ Harris

ACT with Love

Mindfulness is a “hot topic” in Western psychology right now. It is increasingly recognised as a powerful therapeutic intervention for everything from work stress to depression. It is also an effective tool for increasing emotional intelligence. Mindfulness is a mental state of awareness, focus and openness - which allows you to engage fully in what you are doing at any moment. In a state of mindfulness, difficult thoughts and feelings have much less impact and influence over you - so it can be utilised very effectively when you're struggling with painful thoughts and feelings about sex.

Mindfulness is an important component of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy. In the context of ACT it simply means noticing what you think and feel and allowing those thoughts and feelings to be there – even if you don’t like them or agree with them. In a state of mindfulness, difficult thoughts and feelings have much less impact and influence over you because you are not getting all tangled up in that experience.

The more mindful you are when having intercourse, the more you will enjoy the experience. This is because mindfulness allows you to disengage from thought and rather engage with the act with all your senses.

You can get more ideas on sensual sex in our section on sensuality for satisfying sex.

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